I Will Miss George Michael

I am feeling pain from the sudden death of Singer/Songwriter George Michael.  He was part of my life and memories.  I’m a child of the 80’s and followed him throughout his career.  The world lost a beautiful soul and a beautiful voice.  He will be truly missed.

As he walks into the loving arms of Jesus, I will celebrate with gratitude all of the songs (and awesome lyrics) he has left behind.  Never to be forgotten.


When you feel alone….

FOR “P.J.”

When you feel alone just remember that you are not- I am here for you.  You have gone through so much in your short life but I’m here to be your barrier.  I’m here to remind you of what is important, to stay in your own lane and stay focused.

I want only what is best for you and the tools you need to help you make peace with your past, make your present life a happy one, and your future only the brightest.

I’ve gained so much knowledge and peace over the past 5 years I just want to share it with you, with the world.  For anyone struggling with self-esteem, self-worth, doubt, feelings of worthlessness, feelings of inadequacy, worried about what “OTHER PEOPLE” think of you and how you love yourself.

An interesting question was posed and even stumped me:  If someone asked you to list the people that you love, how long would it take to name yourself as well?

You are a special unique gift from God.  Each and everyone of us.  He doesn’t make mistakes; he makes each of us individual.  You don’t have to apologize for your shortcomings, you just need to work on them- especially if they are detrimental to your growth and happiness.  He doesn’t expect you to be perfect, just to try to act as He would in a situation, take that into consideration.  Love as Jesus loves you.

Maybe there are parts of you that feel alone and separated from others?  Maybe you feel “different”.  You are different and that’s the way God intended for you to be.  It’s what makes you Y-O-U.

Some of us struggle with mental illness, I am one of them.  But there is hope.  There is hope that all the information we gathered over the years; all the counseling (from friends, from parents, from therapists, and psychiatrists, ministries) will one day all just CLICK and you will find yourself in better place.  That is what happened to me.  I’m not perfect, I’m still a work in progress but I’ve gained so so so much knowledge of what is important and what is not over the past 5 years and have been consistently happy for that time.  I’m happy.  I can genuinely say that you are not alone in your struggle.  It’s real.  But, there will be a time when you have a major break-through and can see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I have faith.

Every.  Single.  Day.  We wake up with a choice of how our day is going to go.  How we are going to feel and how we are going to act.  We have a conscience decision we can make on how to fall into old habits or how we can retrain our brain to move toward the positive and also remind ourselves vigilantly that we are OKAY.  We count, we matter, we are not alone, we are strong, we have value, we are needed, we are creative, we are intelligent, we are powerful, and we can be at peace with this war trying to go on in our heads.  We control our destiny – our illness does not.

If you are struggling but trying your best to fight the good fight- I just want you to know that I’m truly proud of you for all your hard work.  It’s not easy but it’s well worth the effort, the payoff is great.  Keep at it, keep reading, seeking counseling, educating yourselves on an effective plan to make yourself better – you got this!

Try not to let outside interference jumble your progress.  Stay away from other people’s drama in your own recovery — it’s too confusing and hurtful to your progress.  Stay in your own lane and take the time to care, love, and nurture your OWN self for once in your life.  Commit to making this be about YOU.  One day at a time, one positive thought at a time – reaching out to those that understand what you are going through for love and guidance.  Only hang out with quality people, stay away from all the negative drama so you can truly focus on what matters most; you and your health and well being.

Pray.  When you are at your lowest and have no where to turn, turn to God.  Be sure to thank and praise him when things are going well and pray for continued healing.  I will pray for you as well.  For anyone suffering from mental illness- I’m there for you, I’ll send up good vibes and prayers.

Try to remember all of the things that go right during your day instead of focusing on the bad.  When your mind sends you a negative message, CATCH IT- and crush the shit out of it.  It’s incorrect and needs to be reassigned a new positive thought to replace it.  You can do this.  It’s a daily decision- I hope and pray you start today to make your life better.  It’s possible.  You are not alone and I have faith.

When You’re weary, feeling small
When tears are in your eyes I will dry them all
I’m on your site, oh, When times get rough
And friends just can’t be found
Like a bridge over troubled water,
I will lay me down,
Oh, like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down
When you’re down and out, when you’re on the streets
When evening falls so hard, I will comfort you
I’ll take your part when the darkness falls and pain is all around
Yes, like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down
Oh, like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down
Sail on, silver girl, sail on by
Your time has come to shine
All your dreams are on their way
See how they shine
Oh, if you need a friend,
I’m sailing right behind
Yes, like a bridge over troubled water
I, I will ease your mind
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will easy your mind


30 Day Blog Writing Challenge: Day 1

Day 1 ~ Discuss your current relationship:

We’ve been married for 25 beautiful years.  We’ve had our ups and downs ~ but the majority have been “ups”.  We have 3 beautiful children, a lovely daughter-in-law, and a darling granddaughter who just turned 5 years old.

We are currently living with our youngest son still at home.  He works a lot and is never home.  We all work full time.  My hubs works days and I work the night shift so we are currently like two ships passing in the night except we spend the weekend together.

I wouldn’t change one single thing about my current relationship except me having a day job so I could spend more time with my hubs.  He and I are like two peas in a pod.  We are “on the same page” and he makes me laugh my ass off daily.

We respect one another and care about each other in a way that I feel is very special.  I love him more than anything on this planet, he is my #1 and always comes first.  I’d do anything for him, and my goal is to see him happy and comfortable.  I KNOW he feels the same way about me by the way he treats me so nice.  It’s nice to have finally been together so long that we fit into a groove together that nobody could disrupt.  I’d say we are very comfortable but he always keeps me on my toes by constantly making me laugh and surprising me daily with his kindness.

Here’s the 30 day blog challenge I’m doing below, feel free to join in and send me a link so I can check out your answers 🙂



My Budding Little Artist

For A’s Birthday the hubs and I purchased an Art table for her since she enjoys drawing, painting, and coloring so much.  For Christmas Santa stocked up on some serious art supplies for her.  I have to say that being a Grandma and Grandpa has to be one of the biggest of life’s blessings.  She had a blast on my last visit making a color palette. I let her pour out her own paints and then watched her go to town.


Thing is about being a Grandma which is so terrific is that you don’t have to worry about doing the laundry, doing the dishes, or cleaning- you simply get to go over to their house and enjoy her company and spend quality time with her.  What a luxury!  To be able to sit there and actually talk and connect with this beautiful little being — there are no words for the love I have for this beautiful angel in my heart.


I watched her paint for an hour and then we played volley ball with a balloon before having lunch and then having to hurry back home to rest before work.  This was a beautiful day.  So lucky and blessed to have my family and to have the time to spend with this little granddaughter of mine.  Love you A!


IT Make-up brand

I was shocked to receive a whole new line of make-up from my sister PJ for Christmas by the name of “IT” Cosmetics.  She went all out and got me everything I needed to get started.  I cannot thank her enough for her kindness and generosity- I just love make-up.


Developed with leading plastic surgeons, IT Cosmetics® creates clinically proven, innovative, problem-solving color cosmetics and skin care products that harness cutting-edge, Anti-Aging technologies and high performance, skin-loving ingredients to provide you with serious beauty solutions designed to give you the power to look and feel your most beautiful! IT’s truly your beauty, but better!TM

First, “Color Correcting Full Coverage Cream” ~ a good solid, strong base; light to touch but definitely full coverage and very smooth and silky at the same time.  This buttery soft goodness really evened out my skin tone.  I’ve been using Bare Minerals I.D. make-up for years so I was a little leery to try new, but WOW, am I ever surprised at how nice it is and how good it is!  You might also notice from the below pic that it is SPF 50+ UVA/UVB protection which is amazing in and of itself.


Next, was the “Airbrush Perfecting Powder” – I love this product.  I have shiny skin so this is definitely in order.  It also has SPF 50+ protection and boasts the most beautiful iridescent case and make-up pad.  Goes on flawless and provides complete shine cover up.  Perfect for touch ups.  My skin is glowing tonight.


For my eyes a new  Anastasia Beverly Hills Modern Renaissance Eye Shadow Palette which can be purchased at Sephora.  An eye shadow collection with 14 shades in neutral to berry tones.  A present-day take on Renaissance colors, this eye palette features 14 shades that let you create stylish, day to night looks. From the earthy yellow and ultra-matte finish of Golden Ochre to Primavera’s shimmer gold with a metallic finish, this palette’s high-pigment shadows are crease and fade-resistant and are sure to bring modern elegance to your eye looks.  There are actually links here and here on youtube on how to use this palette so I will check that out later.  Tonight I’m wearing Primavera (shimmery gold with an ultra-matte finish) on my bottom lid and Vermeer (iridescent shell with a metallic finish) on the top portion of my eye lid.  It went on so smooth and with such full coverage- the brush is deluxe and really holds the product well without it shimmering all down my face which I appreciate.


Next up is the IT Ombre Radiance blush.  I had been using “pink” blush which was not doing the trick this winter whatsoever.  So, this was a welcomed addition.  It works well, the blush color really took to the brush and transferred to my cheeks beautifully!  It went on nice and strong (with the pink I was struggling to get color on my cheeks).  I love the way this is designed and the make-up gives you a natural POP of color in all the right spots.  This best-selling ombré blush is your blush and highlighter in one, and gives your skin a naturally pretty flush of color in just one sweep!


Next I used my own trusty blue eye liner but also was able to try the new IT Mascara.  5-in-1 volumizing mascara that it quadruples the look of your lashes!  It went on nice and did exactly that.  It especially did a great job catching my lower lashes and spreading them out evenly which rarely happens because my lashes are so thin.


Lip stain.  But in a more natural color?  Yassss!  Mine is Rose Flush and I love it!  It’s not all rich and creamy slathered all over my lips; it’s just the right amount of lip color.  It gives me just enough color and just enough product that my lips feel moisturized and I have a little color – I’ll be wearing this daily.  Perfecto!


Want to add a little shine to your pout?  Then I got this CC+ Lip Serum; it color corrects and provides intense hydration to your lips for the true look and feel of Your Lips But Better™. Packed with good for you Anti-Aging ingredients such as clinically shown Collagen, Peptides, Hyaluronic Acid, plus 9 essential butters and oils, the CC+™ Lip serum provides for the ultimate lip treatment.  I used this tonight and love that it compliments the lip stick and felt good on my lips while making them shiny.


Thanks for reading my review on this awesome new make-up line and thank you again to my sister PJ.  I LOVE IT!




The Evolution of Y-O-U

evolve [ih-volv]:

  • any process of formation or growth; development
  • a process of gradual, peaceful, progressive change or development, as in social or economic structure or institutions.
  • to develop gradually
  • to come forth gradually into being; develop; undergo evolution
  • to gradually change one’s opinions or beliefs

Life throws us a bunch of learning lessons.  “Life Lessons” or as I once heard a woman refer to them as, “Life Blessons” which I thought was super cool.  They start happening at a young age.

ALL of our ancestors went through this crazy thing called life and learned some rather harsh life lessons but they are something that generally cannot be “handed down” to most people which is normal.  People often seek good advice but wont learn from it (even though it’s solid, tested, and true) because they have to learn it for themselves.

Some life lessons are small and you can easily recover from, hopefully learning a lesson from it and moving on.  Others can set you aback, be hard to recover from and you can feel “bruised” from the experience and maybe even a little bitter or broken.  It may take a while to seize a lesson from it but if you are a person who has the ability to EVOLVE, then you eventually will learn from it.

I think life lessons and the ability to evolve from them are the siren in our souls, the red flags in life, the alarm bells and whistles of our consciousnesses.  I think they are our guttural reaction which is overlooked and tested.

I’m 46 years young (LOL) and feel as though I’ve had more than my own fair share of life lessons but the good thing about it is that I have evolved and grown from these little life tests.  You can become bitter thinking that the world is out to get you -or- you can realize that you did not trust your gut instinct or the possibility that things would not go your way – put the blame where it belongs; on yourself.  It’s a hard knock to take, but facing the truth forces us to grow and learn to trust others sage advice as we grow older and to trust our own gut allowing us to evolve into a higher being.

Have you ever heard the saying “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket”?  My mom use to say this to us when we were growing up.  I knew what it meant- don’t invest in ONE thing or person because if you lose that thing or person then you are left with nothing.

put all one’s eggs in one basket

Fig. to make everything dependent on only one thing; to place all one’s resources in one place, account, etc. (If the basket is dropped, all is lost.) Don’t invest all your money in one company. Never put all your eggs in one basket. I advise you to diversify and not to put all your eggs in one basket.
This is an example of a hard life lesson; when you invest in someone or something solely and that world comes crashing down and you are left alone or with nothing- when you evolve from that massive destruction, you realize that you must distribute your “eggs” in life in a more diversified manner.  Spreading them out in a gorgeous string where you are not dependent on one thing or person to bring you happiness or depend upon.
But lets just say you did put all your eggs into one basket; whether it be another individual that burned you or an investment that went belly up and you were left with nothing.  That’s where the evolution should begin my dear friend.  Next time you will not put all of your eggs into one basket; but rather spreading them around expanding your options and blessings in this life.  If you can take a life lesson and evolve and grow from it, then you are doing just fine.
There have been times when I’ve been so frustrated and even angry that I had to learn a life lesson the hard way and asked God, “Why did I have to learn that the hard way?!!!!” and he answered me by instilling a growth in my soul that would eventually set me free.  Free from fear, from doubt, from anxiety, from the hurt and the pain and as a way to protect myself the next time this same scenario presented itself to me.  I knew how to navigate it.
Evolving on a personal level is so awesome.  You learn who you are and what you are made of.  You learn that one way didn’t work out so well and you try a different approach the next time and bingo!  It worked and you are happy with the results.  You learn how you need to be treated in this life and you learn how to treat others with respect.  You learn that you are a a piece of fine art in the works – every little detail put exactly where it belongs to be to knit together a masterpiece.
Remember that everyone goes through some pretty harsh life lessons as I am sure you have too.  Please do not let them make you stubborn or bitter, unhappy or angry in the end ~ let them be your lighthouse to a better you.  Let them show you the way to take the right path to make positive changes in your life and to evolve into the beautiful person that you are.
Update: 12/26/16 ~ I’d just like to say that I’m deeply sorry for all the life lessons that other people had to learn the hard way because of me; and my thoughtless, selfish actions.  Looking back on this post made me realize that I’ve done my share of damage to others and for that, I’m just so very sorry 😦

Random Jam #353

What a bit of a stressful time of year.  Gearing up for Christmas feels like a lot of work when you have a family of 6 to prepare for.  All the gifts, the wrapping, the menu planning and more.  I feel a bit overwhelmed.

Today will be a great day though because I get to spend it with:


My beautiful granddaughter.  Today I’m watching her again as her mommy has to work.  We always have such fun together and I look forward to our quality time.

The more time I spend with her, the more I fall in love with this bright, intelligent, witty, beautiful little girl with sass and a fun personality.  I’m wondering what art project we can think of today?

Have a beautiful day all!


I’ve been very busy lately…

I consider it a huge privilege to be asked to watch my granddaughter in the mornings Mon-Weds now from 7a-11:30a.  I cannot express how much I adore spending the extra time with her one on one.  We have been having a ball together.  For a 5 year old girl, you can really have a full blown conversation with her.  She’s much “older” than her age and we talk about things that I cannot even believe she is interested in.  Her memory is like a steel trap.  She can recite words and definitions that I taught her long ago.


A big part of our spending time together is always centered around arts and crafts; drawing and creating things.  Here she is painting an owl piggy band and she truly enjoyed the process.


I haven’t been writing very often lately because I’ve been getting ready for Christmas.  My granddaughter’s 5th Birthday was on the 16th (and my husband’s was on the 18th) as well so we’ve been busy as a family.  Today I went over to her house and put together the art table that the hub’s and I bought her for her Birthday present.


I actually assembled it myself- electric screw driver and all, LOL!  I had such a feeling of accomplishment when all was said and done.


Little does she know that Papa and I purchased her a bunch of art supplies for her new desk for Christmas; Glitter Pens, Markers, Paints, Paint Brushes, and a professional grade sketch pad ~ a place for her to keep all of her works of art.  I’m so excited for her.

I come from a LARGE family and we celebrate Christmas every year at my sister’s house.  This year was a blast- the best part is the gift exchange game.  Here I am pictured with my mother (87 years young).


Here I am pictured with my 2 sisters and my mother:


This year was snowing and cold so I picked up my mom and also drove her home.  None of my immediate family came to the party as my husband was ill and my 2 sons were working.  My daughter was also working so I was solo but I still enjoyed myself immensely.

The food was great (as always) and my sister and her husband were excellent hosts.  The gift exchange was wild and this year I wound up with a hat that says, “CATS MAKE AMERICA GREAT!” and a really awesome Starbucks Christmas cups and coffee/hot cocoa set.  Oh how we laugh at the gift exchange because some of the gifts that family brings are outrageous.  And, the more outrageous the gift, the more folks want to get their hands on it so there is a lot of “stealing” and so forth in this gift exchange game.