Marriage is a tricky endeavor, isn’t it? It’s amazing and rewarding and yet like a full time job on the side at the same time. Everything loses its luster from time to time. It’s our job to polish it up and make it shine.
I think a lot of marriages fail because the couple (or at least one of them) just feel like it should be “magical” all the time and while it is at times, that requires a lot of work on both parts. It’s not just magical on its own, it’s something that needs to be nurtured and inventive, creative even. I truly believe that the more you pour into your marriage, the more you get out. The less you do, the less you will definitely get out and that’s the little relationship trick that people need to understand.
Just like any relationship – the more thought you put into it, the better it is. But that never happens on its own- you don’t just fall madly in love and stay that way without ever putting in any effort. Let’s be real for a minute. I’m not talking about “date nights” either, I’m talking about ALL the little things that make a marriage/relationship go around.
It’s thinking about your partner first and foremost always, keeping them near and dear to your heart. It’s telling them I love you whenever you feel it come over you and meaning it. It’s text messages during the day for no reason. It’s taking out of a loaf of bread when you see the old one is down to the crust. It’s asking if they are thirsty also when you are pouring your own drink. It’s going out with them to run errands even when you don’t feel like going out. It’s long back scratches in the morning knowing you’ll never get one in return because that’s “not their thing”. But they have their “own things” that they do for you that you don’t. Such as filling your car with gas as soon as it gets low, advancing the laundry without being asked to, and the list can go on forever ~ and it does. It’s little things that add up that let you know you are important, you matter, and that someone is being considerate of you!!!!! And THAT my friends makes you want to do more for your partner in return.
There are people that literally fall out of love because “things are just not what they once seemed to be”. Well, of course they aren’t. There’s always that 6 month honeymoon period in the beginning and then one or the other usually give up and stop doing all the special things; they get lazy. These are the people that drive me crazy. They jump from relationship to relationship until the honeymoon phase is over and they are done and they just don’t get that a relationship is a full time job, one that never ends.
Describing a marriage or relationship as a job is not such an appealing term but the pay is EXCELLENT and the benefits are endless if you do a good job. It’s the one job that you should love having every day.
The benefits are feeling secure in a world of uncertainty. It is knowing someone is on your side always while braving through your day in this big world. It is knowing that you are loved and cherished ~ and most importantly valued and appreciated. It is always having someone to bounce your thoughts and ideas off of. Knowing that someone is there willing and wanting to carve out a brilliant future with you. It’s all these things and more, if you put in the continual effort.