#IBDVisible 


In an effort to spread IBD awareness (it’s day 2 of IBD Awareness Week), I’m about to share something extremely personal. Right now I feel awful. My Crohn’s is flaring. I have abdominal pain, joint pain, weird rashes, fatigue and exhaustion, and I’m really struggling.

However, tonight Jake is competing in his school’s Chief of the Valley man pagaent. So, even though I’m exhausted from just taking a shower, I’m going to be there.

I’m going to try my best to disguise my disease with makeup and a cute outfit. I’m going to take medicine before I leave the house so that hopefully I can make it through the night without running to the bathroom multiple times. I’m not going to eat anything because food will almost always wreak havoc on my intestines (or what’s left of them) when I am flaring. I’m going to hydrate by drinking tons of water and some Drip Drop.

I’m going to do everything in my power to mask my symptoms so that if you didn’t know me well, you wouldn’t know the struggle that I am facing. Please remember that you don’t always have to “look sick” to truly be sick. Most people with a chronic illness go out of their way to hide their struggle from the outside world.

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Debunking the Myth of Superwoman

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I don’t know about you, but often times I feel so much pressure to try to be Superwoman.  I feel like I need to do it all.  This need to do it all is only intensified whenever there is a holiday, birthday, graduation, or other family event.  There are times when I get so caught up in trying to do everything for everyone else that I forget to take care of myself.  This then becomes a huge problem.  You see, I have a chronic illness.  I have limitations.  I know that if I do too much, I will end up paying for it later.  Yet, the guilt I feel about not making everything perfect usually wins.  Well, I’m going to try my best to give up any further attempts at being Superwoman.

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Superwoman doesn’t exist.  She’s a fictional character that exists only in the minds of fellow woman who are constantly trying to do everything for everyone.  Yup, I said it.  Superwoman doesn’t exist.  There are days when my house is spotless, I make an amazing dinner, and I am able to organize everything for my family (schedules, college scholarship deadlines, insurance info, etc).  Then, there are days when I stay in my pajamas all day, I let the laundry pile up a little too high, the house is in disarray, and we have takeout for dinner.  Guess what?  Either way, my family loves me.  Things don’t have to be perfect to still be pretty amazing!

I have decided that this Christmas, instead of driving myself (and my husband and son) crazy with trying to make everything perfect.  This doesn’t mean that I’m not going to put in the effort to make things nice.  It simply means that I’m no longer going to compare myself to other woman.  We are all different, and that is what makes us all so amazingly awesome!  We all have different talents and strengths.  I don’t have to try to be like anyone else but myself.

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I love Pinterest just as much as the next girl, but it can often times make me second guess myself.  I see beautiful tablescapes and homemade gifts galore.  I see people who quite frankly are doing Christmas on steroids.  This can lead to me feeling guilty because of all of the wife/mom things that I don’t do.  Well, not anymore.  I don’t need to compare myself to anyone in order to feel worthy.  God loves me, and my family loves me.  I am enough!

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What “Type” of relationship do you have?

This subject FASCINATES me to no end.  I’m talking about you and your significant other.  That’s right, because inquiring minds want to know.  I’m continuously amazed at watching my friends’ and family’s relations ship “type” – no, not interpreting their “Love Language” but more so, .. how they interact with one another and comparing it to how my husband and I function.   There is no right or wrong as long as it works for the couple.  I just think it’s fun to see and observe🙂

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What I mean is, for example:  My co-worker tells me tonight that she’s super over-tired (we work night shift) because after she had only slept for 4 hours today.  Mid slumber, her husband came into their bedroom, plopped down on the bed and turned on the t.v. and proceeded to watch.  Yes, you read that right.  BUT IT WORKS FOR THEM!  They’ve been married for 28 years and they dated 8 years before that.  Now that would not fly in my house nor would my husband ever even think to wake me up mid-day when I’m sleeping for work.  But please, let me reiterate ~ I’m not judging, I’m just fascinated by the yin and yang of it all.  Each relationship in such intricate details of what works for them and what does not.

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Her husband wakes her up all the time.  However, her husband ALSO cooks dinner for her all the time too.  While mine would never dream of waking me on purpose, he would also never cook me a meal to save his life which I have to admit would be really nice.

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There are good’s and bad’s in every relationship but what blows my mind is what floats and what doesn’t in each separate one.  I’ve known couples that absolutely do not believe in PDA’s whatsoever.  They show NO affection toward one another.  Zero.  Nadda.  Zip.  I love me some good PDA!  LOL!

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Another example, when we are at our family Christmas party and my husband hugs me, holds my hands, or kisses me; there is a quick barrage of “GET A ROOM!” from my siblings.  They cannot understand how we can still be lovey-dovey after 25 years.  To them we are just nauseating.  Furthermore when asked who my best friend is, and my reply is my husband, my family just says “Oh no way!” like that’s a mathematical impossibility.

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I have another friend whose husband definitely wears the pants in the family but he also goes out on every single family outing they have and does it happily.  My husband and I “share” the pants I’d like to think but I often visit my mom or other siblings by myself while he takes a pass and stays home or goes out with his friends.  Quite often, my husband and I fly solo.  It’s never bothered me yet this other friend and her man do EVERYTHING together – from grocery shopping to the movies and everything in-between.

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I have another friend whose husband and her speak rather crude to one another, even calling names in fun.  At first, I was put off by it and felt bad for her until I realized that it is their “thing” and she shoots it right back at him with vengeance and they are a very in love, happy couple.  In fact, that’s one thing that makes them tick, them constantly giving each other a hard time but IT WORKS FOR THEM.

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Do you ever compare your relationship functionality to that of your close friend’s or family?  I do and I find it completely interesting how the inner-workings are so absolutely mindbogglingly different yet work for each separate couple.

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As for me and mine; what works is that whole mushy-gushy thing we got going.  I need him and visa versa.  We like to give each other a hard time him more than me and we like to be tight-knit.  We are always on the look out for one another and have each others back.  We laugh a lot because he’s funny as hell together and enjoy each others company.  When out, we do show PDA and don’t care what anyone else thinks. When we fight, we hash it out right then and there no matter where we are.  We don’t sit idly by and let one another get away with shade.

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In every relationship there is some give and take; I personally think it’s interesting to observe what is given and what is taken and how it’s then disbursed back into the mix.

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What if your pet could only talk to you at midnight for an hour?

What if?  That would be THE coolest thing in the world, everrrrrr!  I have two Dachshund’s; a long-haired female: Bella and a short-haired male: Cozmo (named after Cosmo Kramer in Seinfeld).

I think Bella would tell me about all of her worries, because she’s a little skittish but Cozmo, my #1 BFF would tell me how happy he is, we’d talk about life- because he’s part human.

Cozmo and I would have long talks, he’d tell me that he wished I took him on walks more often and that he wished I never had to leave the house.  He’d mention that he wished he had tastier food and more of it.  He’d really like it if I shared my food with him.

I’d thank him and tell him I think he is the most handsome boy in the world and that he’s my best friend.  I’d tell him I appreciate all the times he’s there for me when nobody else is, and how he has never let me down.  OH!  The talks we’d have, that human little fur ball of mine.  I love them both.

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List five things you want in a relationship.

  1. I want someone that wants only the best in life for me.
  2. I want someone who makes me laugh.
  3. I want someone with good work ethic and morals.
  4. I want someone strong in mind and body.
  5. I want someone who just “knows” what I need.

I have this and more.

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An acrostic poem using your full name and three words that describe you—good and bad

Write an acrostic poem using your full name and three words that describe you—good and bad— for each letter. For example,

S: sensitive, stubborn, smiling.

A: artistic, argumentative, agoraphobic

M: melodramatic, moody, magical

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~~*~**~~*~*~*~*

ANNEBELLA:

A:  Artistic, Anti-social, Articulate

N:  Naughty, Naive, Nerdy

N:  Nice, Nuclear, Nostalgic

E:  Entertaining, Eccentric, Euphoric

B:  Bizarre, Bright, Baffled

E:  Engaging, Erratic, Exposed

L:  Loving, Loyal, Learning

L:  Lively, Lonesome, Love-Struck

A:  Animated, Affecting, Annoying

 

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